No Substitute for Happiness

There are a few days gifted to each one of us when everything seems right. When the weather is perfect and a good book, a hot cup of coffee, a lovely breeze easily manage to soothe the soul.  When thinking of someone brings a smile on our face and the love for life just blossoms. 

How I love those special days when the mundane turns magical, making the world seem like a better place.  I can think of many such times when inner joy reaches a different realm and there remains no substitute for happiness.  The initial brush of romance, the gentle gaze of a lover, the surprise gift outside your door, a lovely compliment from a stranger, a sudden act of kindness, a smile, a gesture of friendship - all these little things make life so magical.  I am sure you have had such days as well when you felt complete in the moment.   

Such days maybe plenty or rare

Either grounded in reality or floating here and there

When things seem boring and life seems slow

They are needed to give life a smooth flow

 

So do look for happiness in the rain

Love a little, laugh a lot and once in a while feel free to act a bit insane  

Let miracles happen to you and make 'em happen for others too

Remember to capture the moments that often woo you

When life offers precious gifts of joy camoflaged in a lovers gaze or in a child's smile

Unwrap and carry them along as for someone else you too walk that extra mile

There is no substitute for happiness

The more you have the better it gets

  

Midnight Brawl

"There was a law against drinking n driving hence we didn't drink and drive, but since there wasn't a law for drinking and fighting, we fought!!!"
                                                                                            - Anonymous drunk fighters

Pubbing is certainly considered a pleasurable experience, but often under the spell of Beer and Bacardi, when the clock strikes 12 and the heat turns up, when push comes to shove, a fight breaks out... and many a times for no apparent reason at all.

Those who often witness the midnight brawl know not to get scandalized.  For the rest of us, it is a rather taxing sight. 

The other night, as a group of us joyfully entered a club in the dream city, we certainly didn't know how the night would unfold.  As we proceeded to the bar to order drinks, a group of women perhaps uninitiated to pub culture, monopolized the bar space.  They suddenly got over-possessive and began to pull us away from there as if we would steal their non-existent boyfriends.  Apprehensive that their newly acquired space was being invaded, they strongly protested that everyone go to the other side.  They seemed like pub rookies. Though we were hardly pleased by their overt rudeness, we stepped aside.  Soon enough, one of the women began accusing people around for bumping into her. 

What did she expect at an over-crowded club?  If the need is for space, peace and calm, a spa would be a better option for a Saturday night indulgence.  

Things got better for a while once we moved to another area.  The music went on, people danced, they drank and as the party got over, things went back from good to worse.  A fight broke out amongst a bunch of drunk guys, for reasons best known to them (or maybe not).  Suddenly everyone was escorted out but that didn't stop the verbal abuse.  With full aggression and a warrior spirit, guys swore at each other and refused to be civil.  The only saving grace were the bouncers who tried putting a stop to the crazy action sequence.  In an attempt to cease the drama, many were pushed and pulled for no fault of theirs.  Our driver could not be located, thanks to a married friend who was busy hooking up with a random stranger (who thought her husband was her cousin)... whew! 

What a crazy night! Some people just need to brush up their clubbing skills and pick up their guide on pub etiquette from the nearest bookstore. 

Until then, ignorance is bliss! Enjoy clubbing!!!

Dating -- Love in small dozes !!!

The other day, I met up a friend over coffee. Right after we exchanged pleasantries, a grand declaration followed, "I have decided to just date, have fun and not get seriously involved with anyone!"

Was this a way of safeguarding his non-committal tendencies or was he genuinely shying away from a long-term relationship, I thought?  Although such a statement is certainly not a deal breaker, women often become guarded when they hear stuff like this. 

Perhaps for some men, it is important to let women know that they are not up for any kind of commitment.  This is of course on the basis of an assumption that the woman wants commitment from them.  Having said that, these guys deserve the benefit of doubt.  After all, it is better to be honest from the beginning rather than keep others wondering. 

While love happens on its own, dating and relationships only happen when one deliberately chooses them. Most singles love to date but they are oblivious to communicating their true desires to their chosen partners.  The result is seen in the form of mixed signals.

For some singles life is so busy that they prefer occasional dating over a commited relationship.  While time could be a constraint, it is mostly the unwillingness to be consistently involved with one person that keeps them away from a relationship. 


Some like to be with a significant other and some like to be with others who are not so significant.  With so many options around, the fear of being committed to one person keeps lingering in the minds of many.  For reasons best known to them, a lot of people may prefer casual dating over a serious relationship.  Although it is a personal choice, what's intriguing to observe is that eventually mostly everyone wants an ideal partner... the happily ever after.  Then what is it that comes in the way of getting it?  

Is it the fear of commitment? Is it not being certain of what we really want in a partner? Is it the past baggage that we tirelessly carry around? Or is it the fear of losing out on the imaginary dates over a real relationship?!  For all those who suffer from "the grass is greener" syndrome, there isn't much hope for a consistent relationship. 

The need for freedom also plays a role in deciding what one leans toward. Often commitment phobia persists in the mind even after one gets a strong urge to be with someone.  The tug of war between the heart and the mind continues... whether it serves a purpose or not, no one knows.   

Having said that, no one can undermine the joy that love offers.  If every date is not viewed as an audition for a life partner, then a nice friendship can evolve from it.  Honest communication and mature thinking are key and can help avoid misunderstandings between partners. Someone aptly quoted, "Don’t say you love me unless you really mean it, because I might do something crazy, like believe it."

Whether it is one date or relationship of a lifetime, it should be valued and truly enjoyed.   Author Stacie Cunningham says, “Love is like a piece of art work, even the smallest bit can be so beautiful.”   Some like to enjoy consistent relationships while others are okay with occassional bouts of romance.  Love is amazing... even in small doses, it can do wonders for the heart. 

In Pursuit of Becoming a Television Anchor

As the cell phone rings, Anya quickly answers it without skipping a heartbeat. She immediately takes a pen and starts jotting down an address where she must meet this guy. No, it is not a date that gets her so pepped up, it is the casting call that she has been waiting for since she stepped foot in the city. The caller is a coordinator who has shortlisted Anya’s portfolio for an anchoring assignment.

As she enters her first audition, Anya is surprised to see the number of people who have also turned up for the part. She quickly writes her name on the cue sheet, finds a chair and starts observing people amidst the disorganization. Most of them are well groomed and seem confident, while some lack the x-factor. The wait is long and getting up to face the casting director could take a while. Nonetheless, everyone gets a shot in front of the camera. Who will be the individual to get the job? No one knows…

Often, caked-up hopeful faces in long audition lines question the illusion of glitz and glamour in media. What once seemed like an attractive fantasy now appears all too complicated. In the quest to outdo others who happen to be in the same boat, one begins to wonder how the elaborate dream of being on television can be realized. Often fantasy and reality are poles apart and the paradox can be appalling.

Usually before stepping into the world of television anchoring, one does not know what to expect. Several erroneous perceptions and myths dominate the mind. Some think that having a degree in journalism will secure them a job, while others assume an attractive physical appearance would do the trick. The assumptions vary.

The reel-dreams that precede real-time success demand a lot more than simply good looks. Effective communication skills, a good command on language, consistent high quality work, commitment, diligence, destiny and unwavering faith are some ingredients that create possibilities. Contrary to popular belief that being an anchor is easy, it is often seen that performers go through a myriad of phases… from having butterflies in the stomach, difficulty memorizing scripts and unruly nerves to being camera friendly, smooth and sometimes even over-confident.

Being a good anchor has several elements. Though it is mainly about artistic yet effortless performance in front of the camera, visual appeal, effective communication, subject knowledge, program content, clarity of speech, wit and a pleasant personality significantly matter. Hence, weaving all these elements together is imperative in striking a chord with the viewer.

Many a times, television channels and their presenters operate on the imitation module. Whenever someone does a new thing, others follow suit. In this case, imitation is not the best form of flattery; instead it reflects lack of creativity. The joy then lies in discovering one’s own style as a presenter rather than cloning someone else’s. Flaws and rectifications, trials and errors, are all part and parcel of the job. For a television presenter, versatility is a virtue. Being able to host diverse shows of dissimilar genres takes skill.

Success is a process. Although getting significant work as a television anchor may take time and effort, it all seems worthwhile when wishes come true even in small doses. Passion for the job, the right attitude, positive work ethic, strong screen presence, professionalism and a desire to evolve can create on-screen magic.

Once the foray in the world of television begins, a bitter-sweet experience unfolds. Becoming a television anchor is not easy. Apart from other things, it requires patience, hard work and a positive mind set. With the correct blend of ingredients, immense possibilities can be tapped.

After all, it is an extra-ordinary ability to turn dreams into reality. The transition from aspiring to becoming feels so good that eventually memories of waiting in those long audition lines fade away.

The Joy of Endings...

If you want to fill the cup with fresh water, you need to empty it first, advised a friend.  While I intently listened and was even inspired by this zen philosophy for a fraction of seconds, the thought of endings wasn't very comforting.   

I had been hosting a fantastic television show and it was about to end. Though everyone working on the show was mentally prepared for it, there was a slight hesitation to step out of what had become the "comfort zone." This not only meant looking for new work, it also meant not going to the same place everyday (which sounds quite refreshing in theory), and it also meant making new decisions.

I knew I had to do other things and the show was ending exactly when it was supposed to.  So after making a gracious exit I realized that letting go was not as easy as I had imagined.  All of a sudden, there was so much free time to do whatever I wished, yet the disenchantment of something missing played on my mind.  It felt as if something had been left behind... 

Since playing the blues out loud is not my thing, I made a deliberate attempt to move on.  I was aware that all beginnings eventually have an end yet the transition wasn't all that fun.  Afterall, this is what happens between endings and new beginnings. No matter how much knowledge we have, some processes take their own course. 

Change is inevitable and probably the only consistent thing in our lives.  Once we accept this, the transition becomes easier.  Instead of having remorse over why something good ended, we could rejoice that we were blessed to experience all that good in the first place.  

An end is what precedes a brand new beginning. Perhaps the transition is mildly uncomfortable, however its just a matter of time. Ending things gracefully  is key to allowing new beginnings to unfold.